In the ten-year period from 1996-2006, 21 Cornell students committed suicide. Thirteen of them (approximately 62 percent) were of Asian descent. Additionally, there have been suicides at Cornell by non-students.

In at least four cases, people killed themselves by throwing themselves into the gorges.

Good fodder for comedy? Here’s one Cornell blogger’s (D. Evan Mulvihill) take:

President David Skorton announced the plans for the construction of an Asian Community Center at a midday press conference today. The building is to be located directly adjacent to Uris Library on the Clocktower Side, and will be designed by the famous architect I. M. Pei.

“I believe that this building will dramatically reduce the amount of Asian suicides at Cornell,” Skorton announced. “We also plan to fill in the gorges with those chewy bubble tea orbs so that distraught students will have to rely on other methods.”

The article has since been deleted, but its cache remains:

Among the centers many features are the Pokemon Card Trading Arena, the Mi-So Slipi Lounge equipped with 100 beds for study break naps, and one-seater dining areas with calculators built into the tables. Many students are most excited, however, about the center’s Lucky Sun Moon Restaurant, which features MSG, beef with broccoli, and cat-fish casserole, which incorporates not catfish but a mixture of cat and flounder.

“Our plans were substantially modified after meeting with the Asian and Asian-American community,” said architect I. M. Pei. “The original plans called for an underground parking lot, but it was scrapped based on the projected amount of parking mishaps. That was something I did not foresee, perhaps because of my squinty eyes.”

Most Asian students jumped for joy upon hearing the news. Student Mi-So Honee remarked, “Is so close to libelly!”

Other students were appreciative that the name was changed from the Little Rice Room Place. “Besides being a sirry name, I couldn’t rearry pronounce arr those R and Ls,” said Henry Joon-Kimyung-Jook.

ED’S NOTE: I’m not really this lacist… but then, again maybe everyone is:

Apparently this “humor” article caused an uproar, which lead to an “apology”:

I wrote the satirical fake news article intending to exhaust the full spectrum of stereotypes about Asians. It was also an April Fools’ Day joke. It was intended to be so, so over-the-top that it might come across as not tasteless. In the end, I think if I had used only the positive stereotypes of Asians instead of the others (poor pronounciation, higher suicide rates, etc) then it might not have been such a flop.

I personally am close friends with many Asians, and don’t have any prejudgments about them. I know that as a whole Asians tend to be more studious which is what the article was supposed to harp on: the funniness that an Asian community center would be built right next to the library.

I’m glad that you would like to hear my side, because I think the discussions about racists and racism usually amounts to the “oppressed” group sitting together and whining about how oppressed they are instead of actually seeing what other people perceive their group.

So a commenter calls him on this crap (the Asian friends! the whining of the “oppressed”), and the “apology” gets written yet once again.

In response to three critical comments, the author posts again:

Clearly, this is a very emotional subject for a lot of Asian-Americans, and I didn’t realize that. I’m sorry that I played around with stereotypes, and made fun of an ethnic group. Apparently this isn’t enough for you guys–what more do you want? You are reading a lot more into this than is necessary. Please let it go.

D. Evan Mulvihill, did you know that the Cornell task force identified one of the issues facing the Cornell Asian American community as the “lack of recognition and awareness of the reality, experience, and impact of racism and stereotyping as they relate to Asians and Asian Americans”?

Maybe you could have talked to somebody who knew Ash Thotambilu or Jun Wang. Maybe then you would understand why a joke about suicides by people of Asian descent at Cornell wasn’t funny. Maybe then you’d understand why you compounded the problem by heaping on tired old racist “humor.” Because isolation is often a factor in suicide, and maybe that isolation has to do with people making fun of you and then claiming it’s “just a joke.”

Maybe you would start to understand that you are a part of the problem.